In an attempt to stir some appetite into my gin soaked stomach and to satisfy the morbid urge which permenantly resides in me, I am going to compile a list of foods I could never live without and which would certainly be on my last meal wish list should I ever find myself on death row.
1. Welsh Fry Up
An obvious first choice for me as my life would be unlivable without this fantastic meal. Scientific fact right there. But the bacon MUST be crispy and not undercooked so that the rashers look like pale straps of leather and NEVER under any circumstances 'cooked' in a microwave. Thats just committing a terrible culinery sin. Not to mention wasting perfectly good swine. Eggs must be done 'sunny side up' too as our American chums call it. None of this frying on both sides like I have witnessed in some cafes. Why do it? I want my yolk yellow and runny not resembling a burnt offering. Nice premium pork and apple sausages of course. And a few black pudding pieces and a slice of fried bread to complete the job. Never add hash browns because contrary to what some believe, hash browns DO NOT go with a Welsh Fry Up. Ever.
'Thats enough for me love'
2. Cawl
A Welsh dish and strong contender to be our national food. It contains lamb or mutton (with the fat trimmed off the broth during cooking), beef, pork or bacon. Vegetables used also vary, though leeks are often included, as are potatoes and carrots along with celery and onion and parsnip or turnip.
'Cawl cennin' on the other hand is a leek cawl that is made without meat but using meat stock. Cheese is a delicious addition. Cawl is best made by grandmothers and old aunts as they have the right skill required to make the sacred stew. There is truly an art to cooking it. Get it wrong (as young 'uns usually do) and you end up with a watery bowl of soup. That is not cawl. Cook it correctly using the old traditional way and you have a broth fit for God Himself.
3. Roast Dinner
Sundays were the highlight of the week for me (food wise) when I was growing up. We would go to my grandmothers house for Sunday dinner and boy the beautiful aroma would hit you even when walking up the garden path! It could be roast chicken, beef or pork with mashed potatoes, roast potatoes and the offending veg like swede, parsnip, carrots and sprouts. (I tended to eat the vegetables first in order to get them out of the way quickly.)
Pork was my favourite. One of the reasons was because my grandmother made great pork crackling/rind. Im not sure why but Christmas dinners were never the same as these dinners and of course all a festive dinner is is a Sunday roast on steroids. Maybe thats the answer, too big.
4. Roast Duck With Mushrooms
Get this dish from a Chinese restraunt and its a cracking eat. The giant mushrooms compliment the fleshy, juicy pieces of duck perfectly. And never go the chips route with this meal, always egg fried rice. Putting chips on the plate makes it 'feel' wrong because all the food is chunky. Big pieces of duck and mushroom with rice go much better.
5. Fish & Chips
The great British seaside favourite! You cannot go wrong with fish and chips when done well. Nice golden, crispy batter which melts off the fish to reveal white flakes of cod or hake. (And indeed a lot of other fish too.) If the chip shop gets the chips right and they are not the soggy type offered usually at funfairs, then all the better. I am certain I can smell vinegar even as I type this! Ah yes, vinegar is ESSENTIAL to this meal.
I went through a time of ignoring fish in chippy's, opting instead for pie and chips. What a fool I was! Cod is far superior and healthier too. (In terms of fish meat and the beef in pies not the batter and pastry.) Happy to report that my ignorant palate is now cured and I am in love with fish and chips these days.
But be warned! The shoddier places can make this fine dish a mushy, horrible mess where the batter is soft and the chips are swimming in grease so always choose a chip shop that don't have dead flies on the window sill or slabs of battered fish which have been left in the heated part of the counter for what looks like the best part of a week. (Every town has one of these chippys.)
My personal recommendation is Park Road chip shop in Tenby. I can guarantee you the BEST fish and chips here. Honestly they are divine.
6. Lamb Moussaka
This is a relatively new meal for me having only discovered it 2 years ago but as soon as I tried it I absolutely loved it. Different countries have their versions of moussaka but its the Greek type which sirens my tongue to the dinner table. The dish includes layers of meat (lamb is my preferrence) and aubergine topped with a white sauce. Also thrown in are courgetes, part fried potatoes andsauteed mushrooms which is all then baked to make a mouth watering feast. Delish!
7. Cheese On Toast
An old favourite of mine since boyhood days, a timeless classic that I have never (could never) get bored of. And as simple as boiling a kettle. Toast a slice of bread on one side, turn over and put sliced cheese on top and grill until the cheese has melted and the edges of the toast are...well toasted. Ive tried a few different types of cheese but mature cheddar seems to work best. For added flavour you can also put a dash of Worcester sauce over the melted cheese.
'four slices ta!'
8. Lamb Vindaloo
Can you tell im a big lamb lover yet? (And im Welsh too, ooer!) And this is another newbie for me since I only tried one at the beginning of this year. Amazing stuff! Its famous for its ability to scald the linings of your gob off and do severe posterior damage when on the exit route, but to be honest thats one of the reasons I enjoy it so much. I love extremes. The lamb is tender, the sauce and chili tingling with every bite. This is what curry should be all about, not those lightweight pretenders.
It would also be hilarious to order one of these as a final meal before execution as the clean up crew and autopsy lad would have an 'interesting' time.
9. Welsh Cakes
The only sweet thing on my list and it has to be the beautiful Welsh cake. In Welsh they have many names like Picau Maen, Picau Bach, Teisen Radell or Cacen Gri, depending on which part of Wales you are in. (Picau Maen is the commonest here in West Wales.) They are one of the few cakes that, in my personal opinion, go well with a cup of tea. (Glengetti of course!)
10. Noodles In A Scotch Egg
This is one that you won't find anywhere else. Its a concotion that I myself came up with a long time ago. (Roughly 200 years. Or feels like.) I was rummaging in the fridge during a rare break from drinking and upon noticing nothing more enticing than a scotch egg I grabbed it from the shelf. Now being a man of LARGE appetites (both drink and food) one puny scotch egg just wasn't going to cut it. So I headed to the cupboard and the first thing I clapped my famished eyes on was a Pot Noodle. (Chicken and mushroom flavour for the record.)
The idea hit me in an instant; pull the egg from the....er scotch and fill it with freshly boiled noodles! Don't waste the egg of course, just pop it in your mouth like a yolky gobstopper. And believe me, it tastes great! You only need to cut a small hole in the breadcrumby scotch shell, just enough to get the egg out and then simply tip in the noodles.
N.B. ive not tried any other flavour Pot Noodles so don't know if the beef or curry flavours would work.
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